How did blind dates get such a bad wrap?
Is it because blind dates, by their very nature, offer little promise, or is it that we set our standards too high? What if there was a way to guarantee that every date we embarked on would be a guaranteed success?
Well, guess what, there is such a way.
One of the reasons why blind dates have such a negative connotation is because people are expecting too much, too soon.
When you think about it, what are the chances of a blind date turning into a life-partner?
Not good is right.
However, that is what many people expect from them. I tried to set my sister up with a coworker and before she even had her first cup of coffee with this gentleman, she was already sizing him up as a potential husband. She wanted to know if he had bad credit, what year his car was, did he have any children, and if so, how many and did they live with him, and did he live in the city of the suburb. And most importantly, she needed to know if he had any facial hair.
Finally, I had to stop her, and inform her that she was not marring this man. It was simply going to be a meet and greet, with nothing else promised. I went on to add that all the questions she asked were irrelevant because he was not going to be her husband. I mean, it's possible that they could have hit it off, but with her expectations that high, it was more than likely not going to happen.
My belief is that men and women set their expectations way too high for first meetings. A more appropriate and effective expectation is that you enjoy the conversation and perhaps maybe a good meal, and/or a great cup of coffee or bottle of wine and THAT IS ALL.
The funny thing about only expecting a great conversation and a good meal is that sometimes, something magical happens and you do end up with a husband or a wife, but it is not because you expected it. It's only because neither of you expected it. That's simply how it is.
Here's my idea. In preparing for your first date, think of this person as a passenger next to you on an Amtrak train across country. Imagine that you are in route to the love of your life who happens to be on the other side of the world. This imaginary passenger next to you is just there to keep you company until you reach your final destination. It doesn't matter what he looks like, or where he lives or what he does for a living. What do you care anyway? You're on your way to the love of your life. He is just there to pass the time.
Think of every first date as just someone nice to keep you company until you meet the love of your life. And the more someones that exists, the merrier. If you were to meet nine nice gentleman before you met the love of your life, think about how enriched your life would be once you met your husband. Your mission, if you should choose to accept it, is to see how many wonderful friends you can meet before you meet your sweetheart.
This is how you guarantee a perfect first date.
Set your sights on good conversation, good food and good wine. You will seldom be disappointed.
Is it because blind dates, by their very nature, offer little promise, or is it that we set our standards too high? What if there was a way to guarantee that every date we embarked on would be a guaranteed success?
Well, guess what, there is such a way.
One of the reasons why blind dates have such a negative connotation is because people are expecting too much, too soon.
When you think about it, what are the chances of a blind date turning into a life-partner?
Not good is right.
However, that is what many people expect from them. I tried to set my sister up with a coworker and before she even had her first cup of coffee with this gentleman, she was already sizing him up as a potential husband. She wanted to know if he had bad credit, what year his car was, did he have any children, and if so, how many and did they live with him, and did he live in the city of the suburb. And most importantly, she needed to know if he had any facial hair.
Finally, I had to stop her, and inform her that she was not marring this man. It was simply going to be a meet and greet, with nothing else promised. I went on to add that all the questions she asked were irrelevant because he was not going to be her husband. I mean, it's possible that they could have hit it off, but with her expectations that high, it was more than likely not going to happen.
My belief is that men and women set their expectations way too high for first meetings. A more appropriate and effective expectation is that you enjoy the conversation and perhaps maybe a good meal, and/or a great cup of coffee or bottle of wine and THAT IS ALL.
The funny thing about only expecting a great conversation and a good meal is that sometimes, something magical happens and you do end up with a husband or a wife, but it is not because you expected it. It's only because neither of you expected it. That's simply how it is.
Here's my idea. In preparing for your first date, think of this person as a passenger next to you on an Amtrak train across country. Imagine that you are in route to the love of your life who happens to be on the other side of the world. This imaginary passenger next to you is just there to keep you company until you reach your final destination. It doesn't matter what he looks like, or where he lives or what he does for a living. What do you care anyway? You're on your way to the love of your life. He is just there to pass the time.
Think of every first date as just someone nice to keep you company until you meet the love of your life. And the more someones that exists, the merrier. If you were to meet nine nice gentleman before you met the love of your life, think about how enriched your life would be once you met your husband. Your mission, if you should choose to accept it, is to see how many wonderful friends you can meet before you meet your sweetheart.
This is how you guarantee a perfect first date.
Set your sights on good conversation, good food and good wine. You will seldom be disappointed.
